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<title>TheHahaNews &#45; : United Kingdom</title>
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<description>TheHahaNews &#45; : United Kingdom</description>
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<dc:rights>© 2026 The Haha News. All rights reserved.</dc:rights>

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<title>Royal Pageantry Meets Labour Chaos: King Reads Starmer’s Agenda Amid Rebellion</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/royal-pageantry-meets-labour-chaos-king-reads-starmers-agenda-amid-rebellion</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ King Charles delivered the King’s Speech outlining Keir Starmer’s 37-bill agenda — all while nearly 100 Labour MPs demanded his resignation and ministers resigned. Pageantry met party turmoil in Westminster. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Wed, 13 May 2026 21:08:27 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>Paper candidate wins, phone rings: ‘I’ll talk to work on Monday’ — and Hackney gets green</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/paper-candidate-wins-phone-rings-ill-talk-to-work-on-monday-and-hackney-gets-green</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ A paper candidate in Hackney, Tyrone Scott, unexpectedly won as Greens took control—now he’ll juggle a new council role, a charity job, and a Monday chat with his boss. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Sun, 10 May 2026 18:25:10 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>Vote Green, Get Detention Centres? Reform UK’s Sit‑&amp;apos;Em&#45;Where&#45;They&#45;Vote Plan Sparks Outrage</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/vote-green-get-detention-centres-reform-uks-sitem-where-they-vote-plan-sparks-outrage</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ Reform UK proposed siting migrant detention centres in Green‑voting areas and avoiding Reform seats, prompting cross‑party outrage, legal and practical doubts, and accusations the move is partisan electioneering. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2026 14:14:09 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>London schools swap corridor pacing for seven&#45;minute VR calm rooms</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/london-schools-swap-corridor-pacing-for-seven-minute-vr-calm-rooms</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ A Sutton pilot is using seven-minute Phase Space VR sessions across 15 secondary schools to help pupils with anxiety, ADHD and exam stress, showing quick drops in stress and improvements in attendance and behaviour. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Mon, 04 May 2026 14:14:09 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>The New East&#45;West Line Is Finished — But Only Freight Trains Are Invited</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/the-new-east-west-line-is-finished-but-only-freight-trains-are-invited</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ East West Rail&#039;s first phase was finished in 2024 and carries freight — but passenger trains haven&#039;t started. Delays blamed on elections, contracts, mods and staffing. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Sat, 02 May 2026 12:09:13 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>House prices jump 3% in April — buyers didn’t get the Middle East memo</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/house-prices-jump-3-in-april-buyers-didnt-get-the-middle-east-memo</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ Nationwide data shows UK house prices rose 3% year-on-year in April to a typical value of £278,880, surprising economists amid Middle East tensions and energy worries; household savings and low debt help, but experts warn the rise may be temporary as the Renters’ Rights Act comes into force. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Fri, 01 May 2026 12:12:33 +0300</pubDate>
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<title>After Golders Green Stabbings, Ministers Finally Buy Common Sense: £25m for Jewish Security</title>
<link>https://TheHahaNews.com/after-golders-green-stabbings-ministers-finally-buy-common-sense-25m-for-jewish-security</link>
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<description><![CDATA[ After stabbings in Golders Green left the Jewish community shaken, the government pledged £25m for extra security and fast‑tracked legislation — a rare moment when bureaucracy looks like common sense. ]]></description>
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<pubDate>Thu, 30 Apr 2026 16:25:09 +0300</pubDate>
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